The Joy of Telefonica

I was going to write about how to physically get used to living in Spain, but since my internet connection has been virtually non-existent for the last two days, I thought I would write about the frustrations of dealing with the monopoly communications company Telefonica.

This is the statement made on the English site of Telefonica regarding their 'vision'

"We want to enhance people's lives and the performance of businesses as well as the progress of the communities where we operate, by delivering innovative services based on information and communication technologies'
Spirit of Progress

It is unlikely that anyone who has received services from Telefonica would realize that this is the vision of the company that never turns up when they have an appointment, are unable to understand letters and generally act as a monopoly company would, with complete disregard for their customers.

We have lived for two years in Spain now. Originally we had our main land-line number and our internet connection from them. When our internet connection kept cutting out, we rang their helpline number. Nothing happened. We were told there was nothing wrong with our connection and we must be using the computers too much. Because at the time we did not know anyone at all in Spain, the package we had that allowed us to make free phone calls within Spain was not appropriate and we tried several times to change to a different package. We are paying approximately 80 Euros a month for our internet connection, as the telephone was only ever used for incoming phone calls.

Ultimately we e-mailed Telefonica, because we found a different internet provider (or so we thought!). We asked them to disconnect our telephone and internet connection with immediate effect. This was on 12th June last year. We paid our bill on 21st June and again another bill on the 21st July, after which I went to the bank and discontinued our Standing Order. I rang Telefonica and informed them that we had ourselves put away the telephone and router and when would they come and pick them up. They seemed to have no record of our e-mail. We e-mailed again. Again no reaction. By this time we felt maybe snail-mail might be a better option, so we searched and searched, but no actual physical address to send a letter to could be found. After several more telephone calls, we hit upon the idea of opening a bill that had yet again been sent, putting copies of our emails in the envelope and returning the envelope to Sender.

This seemed to have some effect. In November we received a much reduced bill. Again I wrote to them, stating that as we had actually overpaid, Telefonica now owed us money, not the other way round. Five months later and the whole situation has not yet been sorted.

In the meantime we obtained our internet connection from the Internet Cafe, which has a licence to broadcast WiFi via small antennaes and USB slots. What we did not realise, though we should have, is that the Internet Cafe receives its signal from Telefonica. So, every time it rains, there are clouds, the trees have too many leaves, in fact, whenever there is weather, the connection remains dire.

We are now saving up to join a company called Wipzona, they have a good track record. Some of our friends have Wipzona (sounds fun to me!) and whenever they have a problem a technician appears within a few hours and sorts it out. They also have a postal address. And their charge for WiFi connection per month is 40 Euros. We just have save up to get the installation done.

For those people who are having problems with Telefonica, here is their address, which I finally obtained with great effort and I think should be on public record

Telefonica, Calle Granvia 28, Madrid. Hope this is of some help to someone.

Also, if you do move to Spain and want a mobile contract, try not to go for the big companies like Movistar (Telefonica again) and Orange/T Mobile. There are now more and more small companies that have excellent deals, like Viva (Euskatel combined with T Mobile) and will give you an operator and statements in your own language (English, German or Dutch). There are some others that work on similar lines. Shop around for your mobile provider. Ultimately we have found that using a mobile is actually cheaper than having a Telefonica land-line and a whole lot less frustrating.

Not for the Faint of Heart

Bet you thought this post would be about something horrible like bull-fighting, but no, it is about the perfectly ordinary daily activity of driving a car. Because I have to move from patient home to patient home, I have to drive a lot, so here is what I have learnt about driving in Spain so far.

PARKING THE CAR

It is perhaps no coincidence that the words 'aparcar' (to park) and 'abandonar' (to abandon) both start with an A, since a lot of Spanish drivers appear to be unable to distinguish between parking and abandoning their vehicles. We ourselves (as a joke initially) now mainly refer to parking the car as abandoning it. Cars are abandoned on pedestrian crossings, in bus stops, on street corners, on roundabouts and left double parked. Double parking is very common and most mornings I have to drive past at least half a dozen double parked cars in the main street of the nearest town to get to my early morning patient. These are not delivery vans, which could be expected at that time of the day, they are ordinary cars abandoned in order to purchase bread, newspapers, cigarettes etc. I have been told that double parking is allowed as long as it does not obstruct the flow of traffic, which of course it always does :) But, they do leave on their hazard warning lights, so you can at least see they are there

MOPEDS

There appear to be millions of those, all owned by 12-year old helmet-less riders. These weave in and out of the traffic with complete disregard for their own safety and the overwhelming confidence of the young that they cannot possibly die or injure themselves. Miraculously they tend to get away with it most of the time.

DIRECTION INDICATION

Que? Never heard of that in Spain. I am fairly sure it is not included in standard driving lessons, since no-one bothers to indicate. If you are behind a car and it does indicate, it is 99% certain that the car is being driven by a foreign driver. Never ever ever believe that the car that is indicating will indeed go where it indicates it will, because it most likely will just go straight or turn into the opposite direction to the way it indicates. After all the guessing game is far more interesting than ordinary driving, get used to it.

SPEED

Drive as fast as your car will let you. Drive as fast as possible up to junctions and be almost affronted if a car happens to be passing, since they are making you brake. That seems to be the general idea anyway - and I have now got used to trying to drive a bit further out from the curb so that when a car does push its nose into my path I will miss it (just) - as long as there is no traffic coming from the opposite lane at the same time. Or, and this is just as common, drive as if your car is made of porcelain, when you go over one of the innumerable speed-humps in the road, try to stop in second and then take off again. Do this over every speed hump and soon you will have a two kilometre queue behind you - but persevere and keep doing it anyway - just because you can :))

RAIN

We tend to get all our rain in one big 'lump'. Because most of the time it does not rain in our bit of Spain (even though we are on the plain) the roads cannot cope with rain. The drains do not work, which causes innumerable problems, particularly when driving. The surface is then greasy and very easy to lose control of the car. Drivers here are not told about the increase in stopping distance (something we tediously had to learn off by heart to pass the driving test in the UK) and don't take it into consideration. Great care on rainy days please, unless you like water skiing in your car. Most drivers here seem to love it.

PEDESTRIANS

Pedestrians have an absolute right of way in Spain, and even if they cross between two zebra crossings, you are supposed to give way to them :) Zebra crossings appear every 25 m or so, but most people ignore them, preferring to cross where they come out of the shop to get to their double-parked car. A lot of zebra-crossings are within a meter of the corner, which is very silly, as when you have just turned the corner you are still moving and there is the zebra crossing. So far I have managed to avoid hitting pedestrians, but more luck than driving skill. It is one thing I would change really, the position of the zebra crossings in relation to the corners of streets and roundabouts.

TRAFFIC WARDENS

Do not exist in Spain. If they did, they would need one wheelbarrow load of ticket books each day. Now there's an idea for raising some new taxation!!

No matter how dangerous the roads are though in Spain, apparently Portugal is even worse. My advice is, if you are a hesitant driver, do not drive in Spain. Never buy a new car in Spain or import one, a battered second hand car is fine. Most cars here get dents in them very quickly because of other car's doors being banged into them, parallel parked cars hitting them front and back, and general chaos on the road. Having said that, when they do have little scrapes, there does not seem to be the animosity I have witnessed on British road in similar situations. Mainly both drivers just look at the damage in amazement, and then go home, no exchange of insurance, no-one plans on having the damage repaired, no big deal really.

Such a perfect day

What a beautiful day. The sun is shining, the sky is blue blue blue and there is not a cloud in sight. What we at home call 'a blue golden day', one of the reasons we moved to Spain. Early spring here is a bit like summer in Holland and the UK, the countries we have lived in previously. I found myself singing whilst driving back from one of my patients. Singing badly, but hey, there was no-one who could hear it, and it seemed to come from somewhere deep inside.

Normally I do not like Sundays. They are my busiest day, because no-one else wants to work, and I have an extra patient three times on a Sunday, making it a day with little time for home, family cats and dogs. But today...everything just felt great. Wish I could bottle that feeling and release it when the day does not feel so perfect.

On the way back to our village I saw a field and someone had just released some goats into it. I have always loved goats and often thought that if I ever moved to Spain I would get a house with a large piece of land, and have lots of goats, a donkey, a pack of dogs and hundreds of cats. In reality we spent the first year here living in an apartment, though we now have the loveliest little house with a garden and swimming pool. However since Ben the dog manages to destroy more in one hour in the garden than a whole herd of goats would be able to destroy, I think we shall have to wait with the goat buying until we really do have a house out in the country.

Sophia, our little adopted street cat, is now finally able to move about properly. She was so ill when we first took her on, the vet held out little hope. But she has fought back well, and now she rules the roost. Our two 'English' cats just let her have the lead, they cannot be bothered to fight with her for control, they are older and have learnt that it makes no difference who is top cat, the food will be equally distributed and there will always be a comfortable bed to sleep on anyway.

Ben, our labrador/Rhodesian ridgeback cross, only 14 months old, just wants to play with Sophia, but she has different ideas, and her idea of the best game with him would involve multiple visits to the vet for plastic surgery on his face, I think. I know eventually that will settle down and they will be fine, but for now I have to teach him that not all cats are naturally friendly.

Time to squeeze some orange juice, from the oranges on our own tree. Still cannot get used to the idea that I just have to step into the garden to get my own orange or lemon, unwaxed, untreated and juicy. Then a walk along the sea, before seeing to next patient. Wish this day could last forever.